Married Children

Adult children do not like advice from their parents. (So what else is new?)

This means that - should you see something that concerns you - the question arises as to whether you should or should not say something. If you choose to speak then expect some fallout, no matter how tactful your tone and words.

The situation becomes even stickier when your children are married. Here you have much more to lose, for - since your children's first allegiance is to their spouses - you risk losing more than one relationship, possibly even with the grandchildren.

Married children are more sensitive to your remarks than before marriage because now they are setting up their own homes. They want to equal if not outdo their parents' homes. They want your approval.

Give it.

Not once, not twice, but over and over again.

And when you see something you don't like, talk it over with someone other than your children. (That doesn't mean to talk it over with everyone!)

They do the same when they're upset with you.