Myself, My Family, My Community
A compassionate interchange between my readers (see Comments to previous post)led me to think about the following:
A baby starts out knowing only herself. She sees the world as an extension of her wants and needs. Initially, she recognizes her mother alone, recognizing her mother's presence in a multitude of ways - through touch, sight, smell and sounds. Her mother is now her world. She cares only about her mother's response to her.
Then the baby grows. She begins to notice other people in the world, namely, her family. Her world has now grown, and will continue to expand to include more people - playmates, extended family, neighbors and teachers. They all contribute to her sense of self and provide valuable feedback about how she is functioning in the wider world.
By the time the child has become a teenager, she is a member of a community of people. They now become the standard by which she measures herself. She looks to them to reflect back what she sees in herself. If the reflection is distorted (or if her self-image is distorted), then she might begin to question whether she belongs in that world. The community, unlike her prior experiences of family and self, may not support her and she, G-d forbid, might look for other sources of support.
Therefore, my friends, if your community does not provide support, you would do well to turn to your initial worlds, i.e., those of friends, family and self. You started there and they are your true barometers of who you are.
A baby starts out knowing only herself. She sees the world as an extension of her wants and needs. Initially, she recognizes her mother alone, recognizing her mother's presence in a multitude of ways - through touch, sight, smell and sounds. Her mother is now her world. She cares only about her mother's response to her.
Then the baby grows. She begins to notice other people in the world, namely, her family. Her world has now grown, and will continue to expand to include more people - playmates, extended family, neighbors and teachers. They all contribute to her sense of self and provide valuable feedback about how she is functioning in the wider world.
By the time the child has become a teenager, she is a member of a community of people. They now become the standard by which she measures herself. She looks to them to reflect back what she sees in herself. If the reflection is distorted (or if her self-image is distorted), then she might begin to question whether she belongs in that world. The community, unlike her prior experiences of family and self, may not support her and she, G-d forbid, might look for other sources of support.
Therefore, my friends, if your community does not provide support, you would do well to turn to your initial worlds, i.e., those of friends, family and self. You started there and they are your true barometers of who you are.
posted by Dr. Spiegel at
9:21 AM
|
3 comments
