A Parent's Values

Many of us are in a quandary about how to raise our children. What do we allow and what do we prohibit? As they get older, how do we determine when to bend and when to stand tall?

Each one of us has a certain value system which permeates our parenting. At the same time, we also have our own family history which affects the strategies that we use in parenting. The challenge, it seems to me, is to convey our values yet modify our strategies so that they fit with the personalities of our children and the particulars of the situation.

Let's say your child wants to buy a car. He's worked and has the money but still lives at home. You are afraid that, without the necessity of sharing the family car, he'll have total freedom to come and go as he pleases. You're not ready to give him that freedom because you are concerned that he's too young to truly recognize the risks and responsibilities that come with it.

What are the values that contribute to your thinking? What is a "value" and what is a "fear?"

Furthermore, how do you communicate with your son in a fashion that will convey respect and concern? How do you negotiate the limits? What actions do you take or not?

This is one hypothetical example. I'm sure that there are many true vignettes from your own life.

Back on Track

Many of us start projects and have trouble keeping them up. In fact, that's one of the goals of coaching; i.e., to help a client persist, keep the goal squarely in mind, and succeed in meeting one's goal.

A question from one of my readers, concerning my lack of posting to my blog, brings this problem right to my doorstep. Why indeed haven't I written for the past four months?

Truthfully, I've neglected writing my newsletter as well. Life interferes. I got detoured from my passions by my responsibilities. It's as if there's a road sign in front of me: Careful! Detour ahead!

And one voice - whether that of a friend, a coach, or a stranger - may be all it takes to lead us back to our chosen path.

Thank you, "Anonymous," for expressing your interest in my blog. You have reminded me that I, too, have a voice. It is up to me to use it.