Helicopter Parents
My generation, the Baby Boomers, may be the first to suffer from an overabundance of anxiety. We worry about everything, most of which is not under our control.
The strongest anxiety tends to revolve around our children. From the moment they are born we develop both telescopic and microscopic lenses with which we can tract their every movement.
Thus we have created our own monster, namely, the Helicopter Parent (HP).
The HP is a parent who pays extremely close attention to his or her child or children, particularly at educational institutions. They rush to prevent any harm or failure from befalling them or letting them learn from their own mistakes, sometimes even contrary to the children's wishes. They are so named because, like a helicopter, they hover closely overhead, rarely out of reach whether their children need them or not. In Scandinavia, this phenomenon is known as "curling," describing parents who sweep all obstacles off ahead of their children. (Wikipedia)
The origin of the term is from a 1990 book by Cline and Fay, entitled "Parenting with Love and Logic: Teaching Children Responsibility." The term gained notoriety when American college administrators began using it to describe the practice of some baby boomer parents who called their children each morning to wake them up for class or complained to their professors about the grades their children received!
This type of control and interaction with our children is as harmful to them as it is to us. They may become so dependent or, conversely, so rebellious that their decision-making is totally impaired.
Attention, all Baby Boomers: Our anxiety has kept us aloft too long. We need to get a hold of ourselves and return to land.
Letting go, loosening the ties, is very scary. Don't try to do it alone. But don't run to your children, either, to deflect your fears.
In short: Learn how to live your own life, here and now, on the ground.
The strongest anxiety tends to revolve around our children. From the moment they are born we develop both telescopic and microscopic lenses with which we can tract their every movement.
Thus we have created our own monster, namely, the Helicopter Parent (HP).
The HP is a parent who pays extremely close attention to his or her child or children, particularly at educational institutions. They rush to prevent any harm or failure from befalling them or letting them learn from their own mistakes, sometimes even contrary to the children's wishes. They are so named because, like a helicopter, they hover closely overhead, rarely out of reach whether their children need them or not. In Scandinavia, this phenomenon is known as "curling," describing parents who sweep all obstacles off ahead of their children. (Wikipedia)
The origin of the term is from a 1990 book by Cline and Fay, entitled "Parenting with Love and Logic: Teaching Children Responsibility." The term gained notoriety when American college administrators began using it to describe the practice of some baby boomer parents who called their children each morning to wake them up for class or complained to their professors about the grades their children received!
This type of control and interaction with our children is as harmful to them as it is to us. They may become so dependent or, conversely, so rebellious that their decision-making is totally impaired.
Attention, all Baby Boomers: Our anxiety has kept us aloft too long. We need to get a hold of ourselves and return to land.
Letting go, loosening the ties, is very scary. Don't try to do it alone. But don't run to your children, either, to deflect your fears.
In short: Learn how to live your own life, here and now, on the ground.
posted by Dr. Spiegel at
5:11 PM
|
0 comments
